AztecsAskingHim: Tater Zoob blogger will soon own this site (oops!)

San Diego State’s home game with Boise State is meaningful, no doubt.

If the Aztecs win, it will probably be the biggest victory in the history of the program (sad as that sounds). Hell, it could even be the difference in securing a spot in an irrelevant pre-Christmas bowl game (more on this unpleasantness in a bit).

But it means more than that.

Kevan of the Boise State blog One Bronco Nation Under Faulk God proposed a bet, whereby the blogger whose team wins on Saturday gets a free post on the other blogger’s site. Being drunk at the time, I agreed. Damn you, Charles Shaw!

Anyway, here are his answers to some Broncos-related questions I had. Get used to his writing style, because you’ll probably be reading his work again here real soon. I also answered some questions for him, so feel free to wander on over there.

AztecsKillingHim: Kickers aren’t real football players and they have no business being part of the modern game. Agree or disagree?
One Bronco Nation Under God: I don’t hate kickers as much as the next guy, which isn’t to say that a kicker is going to be my favorite player any time soon unless he is 300 pounds or has half a foot. I tolerate kickers, I understand their place, I recognize that football made a deal a long time ago to make feet and balls a part of the game. Kickers are real football players. Pinch runners are real baseball players. Americans are real soccer players. Nacho Doritos are real Doritos. Some games I wonder, but I always eventually talk myself into a begrudging appreciation for kickers.


With the title dream gone, how badly are your guys looking to wail on someone right now?
OBNUG: I’ll tell you after the first quarter. In theory, Boise State should pound the Aztecs as some sort of cosmic football statement that “We’re Boise State and we don’t lose two games in a row to nobody.” Then again, can you predict how a team rebounds from having its soul sucked dry by a guy with a DIY mohawk and the letters TCU shaved into the side of his head? When Boise State lost to Nevada last year, they had to play Utah State in the season finale and did not exactly set the world on fire. Hard to tell what to expect on Saturday.

AKH: How much has the Doug Martin injury — and injuries in general — hampered your team?
OBNUG: The Doug Martin injury hasn’t been too fatal in terms of offensive production. He has been missed in the passing game and the one obvious occasion when the Broncos needed a back who wouldn’t fumble. The injuries in the secondary are far more concerning. Boise State is down to a true freshman and a redshirt freshman as its starting corners, and they did not have a good go of it last week.

AKH: Is that the excuse that will be used if the Aztecs win?
OBNUG: Oh, absolutely. But it won’t stop there. Bronco fans are nothing if not good at coming up with excuses. If Ronnie Hillman rushes for 200 yards on a bum ankle, be prepared for us to blame science.

Our secondary has been burned for huge plays by college football superstars Marshall Lobbestael and Brett Smith. This “Kellen Moore” fellow isn’t as good as those guys, is he? I sure hope not. I didn’t have time to look up his stats or anything.
OBNUG: You made Marshall Lobbestael up, didn’t you. Ha, you have to wake up pretty early in the morning to fool this blogger.

AKH: Do people out there really care that Rocky shit talked your blue field? You know he just likes to screw with people, right?
OBNUG: Yes, people in Boise absolutely care that Rocky Long complained about the blue turf. It’s scary how much we care. You have to understand that the blue turf is sacred to us and any negative mention of it is like questioning our religion. I suspected that Rocky Long just likes to blabber, a little like an ornery Dick Tomey, but that doesn’t mean Bronco fans didn’t take it to heart.

AKH: I know you guys aren’t allowed to wear blue on blue anymore, but do you really think that justifies wearing uniforms that look like they were dyed in Oompa Loompa feces?
OBNUG: For the record, I am not a fan of the Orange Crush jerseys. Some people love them, some people hate them, some people thought they were Syracuse jerseys. You can blame Rocky Long. He brought this on everyone.

AKH: Do you see any scenarios where Boise loses this game that don’t include the involvement of known gamblers?
OBNUG: Sure. After seeing Boise State lose last week, I can see them losing in all sorts of ways now. Ryan Lindley could have a huge game. Ronnie Hillman could have a huge game. San Diego State could fumble the ball eight times and recover all eight, plus the one that BSU fumbled. Kellen Moore could get injured. Doug Martin and D.J. Harper could get injured. The game could come down to a deciding kick. I could go on, but I’m getting depressed.

AKH: This isn’t really a question but … PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE HELP US GET INTO THE BIG EAST! Please?
OBNUG: Hey, I wouldn’t mind as many West Coast teams as possible in the Big East, and SDSU would certainly be fun to have around. Wyoming on the other hand? No thanks. I’ll see what I can do.

About AztecsKillingHim

Aztecskillinghim is a graduate of San Diego State University, which he attended during both the Ted Tollner and Tom Craft eras (five year plan!). For a time, he was convinced that the Aztecs' bowl drought was a direct result of him arriving on campus in 1999. He has two rescued dogs and a patient but foul-mouthed wife who thinks Tim Shelton is "adorable."
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8 Responses to AztecsAskingHim: Tater Zoob blogger will soon own this site (oops!)

  1. Good stuff. I’m not sure how to feel about being called a Tater Zoob, but this blog just made being in a conference with SDSU a desirable long-term prospect, Rocky Long aside.

    Go Broncos!

  2. NYBroncosFan says:

    What does it mean that only Broncos fans are commenting here?

    I liked Aztecs’ responses on OBNUG though. Funny stuff. Go Broncos!

  3. fatmanfan says:

    just got back from the beach. are tater zoob women as hot as the other zoobies from bread um young?

  4. Jamie Kiskis says:

    Hey, serious question for Boise State fans….How many ducks and other fowl die per day trying to land on your football field thinking that it is a big lake?

    For what it is worth, Boise is my 7-year old daughter’s second favorite team. She calls you “The Horsie Guys.” She wants to know if your Bronco mascot will be making the trip.

    Please let me know on these two things.

    • Buster (mascot) should be there.

      As for the lake/fowl thing. It was long ago dismissed as a myth, but recently Coach Pete said he’s actually seen a dead duck once or twice. And no, that doesn’t include the ones from Oregon.

      • Jamie Kiskis says:

        Do ducks die of natural causes? Or do they just get eaten by predators?

        I’m pretty sure that Aztecs sacrificed any red blooded thing that walked including Broncos, so at least we have that going for us. That and Montezuma’s Revenge.

        Hope you all enjoy San Diego.

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